RELATIONSHIP CLINIC for All Sexualities

Posted on September 14, 2018 by urbanlifeclass

Can you imagine what would happen if you drove a car without lessons? . . . straight to A&E no doubt. Yet most people have no training whatsoever in RELATIONSHIPS and expect a glowing result and a healthy outcome, with no training at all. MADNESS.

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If everyone dealt with their codependency issues the world would spin on it’s axis overnight, which is why this is a number one priority for wellness.

Many have also discovered that ditching or being aware of romantic tyranny is a well played lesson to perfect. Divorce and break-up figures suggest that instead of £15,000 average spend on wedding day nuptials, just spending a fraction of this on therapy, relationship counselling and codependency work BEFORE you tie the knot makes common long-term sense.

Check out elements of this blog site to improve ALL of YOUR RELATIONSHIPS – with people, money, work and work life balance, debt, stress, contentment, depression, joy and ACTION. No day is ever the same, nor are relationships.

No more people-pleasing, needless perfectionism, pointless procrastination and the emotional killer called PROJECTION – companion to anxiety and worry.

BREATHWORK and CODA COACHING will change your life and rebrand your thinking.

In fact REBIRTH YOUR LIFE.

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Adam Spreadbury-Maher shares his thoughts on Breathwork and our Marrakech Retreat 2018.

Posted on April 13, 2018 by urbanlifeclass

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Olivier Award Winner Adam Spreadbury-Maher is an Australian/Irish Theatre Artistic Director, Producer and Writer. He is the founding Artistic Director of the Cock Tavern Theatre, OperaUpClose and The Hope Theatre, and is the current artistic director of the Kings Head Theatre, Islington. London.

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“Initially attending a one day Evolutionary Breathwork workshop in Central London, I decided to take the plunge and travel to Marrakech on the week long Breathwork retreat in March that David and his team hold annually. I didn’t know what to expect, though I went along with an open mind and heart.”

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“The week long retreat was co-led with established breath worker Luisa Bradshaw, a partnership that accounts for over 45 years combined experience, buckets of empathy and good humour, and I felt ‘emotionally safe’ from the start.

Based at a beautiful and comfortable 4-star riad-style hotel, just off the beaten track and hustle and bustle of the main square, in the Kasbah medina, our group was gently eased into the course with care and compassion over the first 2 days in the hotel with hammam, steamed, washed, scrubbed and relaxed in the Spa plus daily group breathwork for emotional and body release.”

http://www.lesborjsdelakasbah.com

“The schedule had plenty of time for us to spend together socialising at meals or relaxing by the pool, alone in solitude and reflection, plus visits to some of Marrakesh’s most exquisite gardens. The day trip to the Ourika Valley at the foot of the Atlas Mountains was a particular highlight for me, along with silent walks in the stunning Anima Garden en route in the morning.”

“Throughout the week, not only was I able to spend sometime focussing on a cleaner and better relationship with myself, I was also able to make new friends and deepen existing relationships.

This is breathwork for today’s pragmatic realistic, who is happy to dodge the crystals and dolphin music; it’s effective, self-led ( yet supported and guided ) self growth therapeutic practice.

Quite unexpectantly, Conscious Connected Breathwork with David Parker has had a hugely positive impact on my life and well being. I recommend David, Luisa and their team unreservedly, in fact . . . I’ve already signed up for next year!”

Adam Spreadbury-Maher

Mo Haque ‘Cancer Recoverer’, rates Breathwork as a regular practice for healing and emotional release.

Posted on December 18, 2017 by urbanlifeclass

Mo Haque returns to ITV London News 18 months after crowdfunding for immunotherapy cancer treatment, sharing his incredible progress. He also shares an exclusive cover for his book ‘Choosing To Stay: How Cancer Gave Me My Life Back’ – For more information about the book visit https://mohaque.com

Mo Haque writes

I began Evolutionary ‘Rebirthing’ Breathwork for the first time in March 2016, a time when my terminal cancer was growing and spreading, a time when the NHS decided against funding a breakthrough immunotherapy treatment for me.

Fundraising a total of £200,000 was a daunting prospect, yet it was my last resort to give myself a chance to live. With help from family, friends and strangers, we raised close to £190,000 allowing me to have a year of immunotherapy treatment. My tumours have subsequently reduced and 6 months on from stopping the treatment (May 2017), the tumours have been stable thankfully.

David Parker’s UrbanLIFECLASS breathwork groups have been an integral part of the process for me. I have been attending every single month which allows me to explore themes that I have been suppressing over the years, whilst learning and integrating new behaviours. Behaviours such as asking for help, receiving help, saying no, establishing and maintaining boundaries.

The sessions also allow me to make sense and feel the emotion from my most recent struggles and release any build up, as and when they occur. They also allow me to acknowledge my successes and encourage me to remember to do things I enjoy even if that means ‘doing nothing’, rather to purely just be. But perhaps more crucial is the learning that I get from hearing other peoples shares.

With individual work with David, I have also found that my creativity has flourished and opportunities continue to open up, since attending regular sessions, like writing my book; Choosing To Stay: How Cancer Gave Me My Life Back, published in the forthcoming year 2018.

I have spoken in Parliament, been on TV several times and being invited to speak on various stages to share my story. I have also been getting involved with different cancer communities and charities contributing to publications, policy documents as well as attending Government meetings.

I continue to take one day at a time, whilst holding an intention to serve and share. The breathwork is a reminder to stay present and live in the moment whilst being mindful of the 4 P’s of destruction; Procrastination, Perfectionism, Projection and People-pleasing.

Breathwork practice has become a staple part of my monthly self care.

Mo Haque Book Cover

www.mohaque.com

Can’t Stay-Can’t Leave

Posted on February 16, 2016 by urbanlifeclass

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I’d like to run away from you, but if you never found me I would die,
I’d like to break the chains you put around me, but I know I never will,
You stay away and all I do is wonder why the hell I wait for you,
But when did common sense prevail for lovers when we know it never will,
Impossible to live with you, but I know, I could never live without you,
For whatever you do, I never, never, never want to be in love with anyone but you.

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David Parker peruses . . .

How many relationships do you know that constantly break-up, then return to the mire of the codependent malady, a few months later? I call these BUNGIE JUMP Relationships. Can’t Stay. Can’t Leave. Bounce back. Try one more time.

Pop songs have a lyrical tradition of loss not love. We call them LOVE ALBUMS, Romantic Operas to intimate connection of the heart, revelling in heartbreak, not heart-warming mindfulness, or the concept that ‘everything is temporary’. We don’t want to hear that, it must last forever, or not at all.

The projection of fear, loss, low esteem, financial depletion or other such devices can keep you in an unhealthy relationship, even in the workplace. Listen to this haunting ‘love song’ of entrapment, capture and coda infusion. Would you call this LOVE?

If you identify with the lyrics, or feel at loss within your relationships, it may be that your emotional intelligences needs re-balancing instead of riding the bungie-jump of fear.

This classic tome comes highly recommended for adjustments.

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FEBRUARY 2016 London Evening Breathwork Groups

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ALL GROUPS NOW FULL. ULC Breathwork 3-page-001

December ’15 / January 2016 3 Breathwork Evening Meet-Ups a month now!

Posted on November 8, 2015 by urbanlifeclass

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November Breathes GO with a BANG!

Posted on October 30, 2015 by urbanlifeclass

After the two OCTOBER Breathing Groups the first NOVEMBER evening BREATHWORK Group on THURSDAY 12th November is now FULL.

The second gathering of only 5 people is on TUESDAY NOVEMBER 24th and 3 peeps have booked already so BOOK NOW.

People have asked for a weekday evening slot to experience Breathwork for the first time or maintain what they have achieved already, so I have created some intimate COACHING/BREATHWORK groups for max of 5 people with a CODEPENDENCY RECOVERY theme. Each 3 hour group session is £30, no more than an evening out these days, but you will feel better for it, working on yourself, instead of working up worry, tension, projection or getting wasted. All for less than £8 a week!

I use my own home, my own *womb space* as many have called it, and all monies go to the Urban LIFECLASS pot to bursary our assistants to attend January’s MAROC Retreat in Marrakech.

The first 90 mins is taken up with Codependency Coaching in some form, followed by ONE HOURS BREATHWORK that puts you into a total space of relaxation and altered states of consciousness. The remainder brings you down, back into your body, leaving you rejuvenated ready to MOVE FORWARD. It is suggested to do ONE GROUP A MONTH ( a Tuesday or Thursday ) or both if you prefer. This space gives you a chance to get back on track with feelings, emotions and solutions to life problems that appear from nowhere.

VENUE : Euston/Mornington Crescent – EACH SESSION Needs to be BOOKED in ADVANCE to secure a space and if you can’t make it you still need to pay, if we can’t get someone to fill your space.

Paypal to codacoach@yahoo.co.uk Contact David 020 7388 3109 or codacoach@yahoo.co.uk to arrange payment. More info on the power of Coaching/Breathwork is here : http://rebirthyourlife.me/rebirthing/

Individual 121 Sessions : £120 / 2 hours, £150 / 3 hours https://urbanlifeclass.me/the-creative-collective/parker/

So what happens on a 5 Day Breathwork Course ( within a 7 night stay ) in Marrakech January 12th 2015 : Start Relaxing, detoxing, pampering and Breathing.

Posted on September 2, 2015 by urbanlifeclass

The Course led by Trainers David Parker and Meleeshka, with over 25 years experience each, is held at a charming 4* Hotel, Les Borjs del la Kasbah, in the Kasbah Medina, up alleyways, full of bustle and moroccan life, so immediately you will feel miles away from home. RELAX.

Arrival Day Tuesday : As most participants will be arriving on early flights from the UK, today is for settling in, napping and feeling the pace in and outside the Hotel. Its a free day, to do as you will, perhaps a massage in the spa ( 45 mins various massages with organic oils from £20 – £32 ). All SPA Treatments can be booked and paid for during your stay, and is up to each participant to decide, as they are extra to the course and with no obligation to partake.

We all meet in the Lounge @ 7pm for an arrival introduction from the Hotel & Trainers before we have a GROUP DINNER @ 7.30pm. This is the only time we we will eat together, throughout your stay you can decide when you eat and who with ( 7.30-9.30pm ) Then it’s the bar, chatting or bed, ready for the first day of the course. Breakfast is from 7.30-9.30am. Accommodation includes a sumptuous breakfast buffet and dinner, paid separately to the Hotel from the Course, and on leaving your stay.

This years theme is : LET’S GET CLEAR ON THE YEAR with a Breathing Group Session of some kind every day for 5 days.

Wednesday & Thursday Day 1 & 2 is spent in the Hotel from 10am – 7pm, with breaks for writing, verbal sharing, in our group room and patio areas so you can experience weather outside too, including lunch breaks around the pool, ( Not expensive : Omelette with french fries and salad £4, Pizza or freshly made Salads £5, Club Sandwiches £5.50 all made to order ).

During these 2 days of letting go you will experience a HAMMAM as part of your course fee and a 90 min Group Breathwork Session on both days.

What is HAMMAM? check out this link. http://www.lifeandsoulmagazine.com/diy-moroccan-hammam-treatment/ A small group HAMMAM 3/4 same sex people is INCLUDED in your 5 day Course fee.

Day 3 Friday : Weather permitting we will take a Day Trip to the base of the Atlas Mountains, included in your course fee, this year we will be going to ASNI-Ouirgane, ( different location than last year ) to be with nature, and have a Breathing Session close to water, in the valley countryside. Written Exercises will be offered to work on during the day as well as plenty of mint tea. Do bring scarves and hats, it can be chilly in the Atlas.

Day 4 Saturday : After morning group we visit the stunning Yves St Laurent Jardin Majorelle ( this year for a longer stay if you came last year – time for shopping and coffee lazing in or outside the Jardin ) In the afternoon we return to the hotel for a group sharing and a full breathwork session. **Friday, Saturday or Sunday activities may swop days depending on local weather at that time.

Day 5 Sunday : A full day in the Hotel with group sessions and a final Conscious Connected Breathwork Session. In the evening a 4 course Moroccan Evening with local musicians is planned for you, with the extra payment ( on top of your HB ) is part of your £350 Course Fee for 5 Days.

Day 6 Monday : With a final Group meet up after breakfast, the day is yours to sightsee Marrakech.

Day 7 Tuesday : Fly home, refreshed ready to GET CLEAR ON THE YEAR.

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FEEDBACK from last year:

“Well I can report back that it was one of the most joyous weeks of my life and perfectly placed for the beginning of the year. In fact I would say that a lot of creative planning for the months to come happened without even trying during those days…Onwards with abundance xx ( CH London England )

“What can I say about my time away except that it was deeply needed and I feel profoundly honoured to have been in the company of so many loving souls. It’s been hard to get back to normality especially as I have to say goodbye to one of my oldest friends next week, who passed over, but I now have both the courage and power to do him justice as I say my farewell whilst being strong enough for my God daughter too, and I thank David and Meleeska for love, guidance and respect that they showed me over the last week, for without these things mixed in with the healing power of laughter, I wouldn’t be able to do it!! All my love to you both, always!! XO ( M. Somerset England )

“The retreat in Marrakech was stunning, beautiful beautiful people, amazing location, huge amounts of love and even more compassion, but throw in huge gales of laughter, it was beyond superlatives. All I can say it was the first break I had taken for ten years, and boy it was worth waiting for, the people were and are amazing, the breath work powerful and simply life changing, and the laughs we had still rings in my ears , roll on 2015, best decision I ever made … Thanks David and Mell big love xx ( JD Somerset England )

Some more Testimonials from last year are here :

https://urbanlifeclass.me/morocco-retreats/something-happened-in-morocco-and-the-echoes-are-still-being-felt-a-month-later/

https://urbanlifeclass.me/morocco-retreats/book-now-for-our-maroc-rebirthing-retreat-january-2016-sara-turner-tells-us-her-tale-of-january-2015/

https://urbanlifeclass.me/2015/02/09/january-maroc-spiritual-retreat-a-huge-success-for-all-so-we-are-doing-it-all-again-next-year/

All prices and info is here https://urbanlifeclass.me/2015/08/09/give-yourself-a-break-maroc-spiritual-retreat-january-12th-2016-can-you-imagine-yourself-spending-7-days-in-marrakech-in-this-glorious-hotel-complete-with-spa/

SPEAK TO US ( not the Hotel ) all we ask for CONFIRMATION is to BOOK YOUR FLIGHTS FIRST! – really CHEAP right now. We will tell you what easy jet flights we are on from Bristol & London. For information and payment options if you want to pay in 2016.

London : David Parker 020 7388 3109 /Robert Beck (+44) 7913862492 / urbanlifeclass@gmail.com Glastonbury : Meleeshka 01458 833381

Depression SOLUTIONS : Rebirthing Breathwork & Urban LIFECLASS Groupwork works for me. YES BREATHE it out.

Posted on May 14, 2015 by urbanlifeclass

by Ted Rogers : Dancer/Performer/Writer/Artist/ Blogger/Poet/Model/Stylist

I’m Ted, 23 years old, and I first discovered Rebirthing breathwork through David Parker, ( here on the right ) a Breathworker with 25 years experience, after he suggested I try breath work and I trust his sound judgement so I decided to come to an individual 3 hour session and give it a go.

But from someone who has been diagnosed bi-polar (rapid-cycling) for 7 years and suffered many ins and outs of depression, medication, therapists and institutions, at first I was sceptical and I also find communicating with people and systems somewhat of a task due to my Aspergers (High-Functioning) syndrome, diagnosed in my teenage years. I was not convinced that breathing would really have that much of an impact on me. I had done meditation and Bikram yoga which both centre heavily around breathing and mostly the outcomes of these activities had been a headache or general exhaustion.

However, testimonials from friends of mine said something different and after having a conversation with fellow breather, Luca Marchetto the night before, outside the George and Dragon pub in Shoreditch, I was excited to experience Rebirthing breathwork. Luca had told me that it is different for every one, although he experiences weird hallucinations and usually “goes under” into a different world and then wakes up feeling amazing! This sounded extremely attractive to me. Especially considering I no longer use external substances to control my moods; the idea that I could experience these things purely with my own body was a bit of a revelation.

My first experience of rebirthing breath work was almost exactly as Luca had described. About 10 minutes in I began to feel all tingly and weird and then I could physically feel my emotions coming out of me as if my soul was releasing it bowels. I was crying uninhibitedly like a child, then I was laughing hysterically, and then crying again. I woke up some time later. The room was at peace and I felt utterly blissful. The food that was given to us in bitesize chunks tasted better than anything I had tasted in years even though it was just some banana chunks and Jaffa cakes. This was enough for me to want to go back for more and I have regularly attended URBAN LIFECLASS SUNDAY MONTHLY SEMINARS, and each time the experience has been different but still enough to bring me back. Even when a breathe has been painful or upsetting it has still felt useful, something clearly needs to be released so I just *go with it*.

Most importantly I have found Rebirthing breath work to be the most effective form of therapy in helping me through tough patches of depression. And if we consider that I have been through many a psychiatric professional, various institutions and 13 different medications over 6 years I think you can agree that this is somewhat of a profound discovery.

What Rebirthing breath work does is it gets you past your intellectual barriers and complicated head based reasoning and puts you into your body. It reaches deep into your soul and gives it a good massage and a shake. What this allows you to do is become unstuck. One of my biggest difficulties with depression is getting stuck. Either in a hole or a loop or a sticky pool of mud. Regardless of the work I have done the day before I wake up the next day in the same pool of shit I started in the day before. This winter I experienced this cycle for an excruciating 4 months and I am still not entirely free of it. However, when I have attend a breath work session it has always shifted something. I can’t always put my finger on what but I can feel that within me something has moved. This in turn has helped to remove me partially if not entirely out of my loop/whole/pool of mud in the space of a few hours.

This is incredible!

Never before could anything get me out of these ruts. Only recreational drugs or extreme life situations ever had any effect; and these two options come with negative longterm consequences whereas breath work does not. Price wise it is even reasonable. Especially compared to other alternative therapies and private medical care. For me I have found accessing therapies through the NHS extremely traumatic and the end result was that I was left on drugs without monitoring or any sort of talking/holistic therapies. Rebirthing breath work has begun a process in me. And I will continue to use it as therapeutic tool for as long as it serves me. I have huge gratitude for David and the assistants who help him in URBAN LIFECLASS group sessions, for showing me breath work and allowing me some release and progress from depression. This is how Rebirthing Breathwork and Urban LIFECLASS make me feel : Refreshed, ALIVE, Energised and FREE . . .

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Ted has written an informative personal piece on DEPRESSION on his own blog . . . .

DEPRESSION is a subject that seems to turn many people into positive thinking experts or is something others would rather deny the existence of as a genuine sufferable illness. But from someone who has been diagnosed bi-polar (rapid-cycling) for 7 years and suffered many ins and outs of depression, medication, therapists and institutions, I would like to offer some of my experience and point out that it is OK and you are allowed to be depressed; it does not make you a bad person to be depressed. . . . http://artpornblog.com/2015/03/28/thought-porn-depression/

Coming CLEAN – I couldn’t LIE!

Posted on April 26, 2015 by urbanlifeclass

My OWNING IT Blog by Catherine Hoffman

Oh my – There was a large group of new peeps and old regulars to Urban Lifeclass in our new room at The Place Dance Centre in Euston on the day I was leading, so that was encouraging – but once we got the room sorted I noticed I HAD LEFT ALL MY NOTES ON MY KITCHEN TABLE!!

Since this Sunday 12th April Seminar was about exploring DECEPTION, DENIAL and Doublespeak. I HAD TO COME CLEAN. So after already confessing ( and trying not to show PANIC ) David said they were all in my head anyway, so I sat quietly writing down what I could remember.

After MORNING PAGES from The Artist’s Way, we started working through various exercises looking at ways in which we use these following three modes in our lives : What is the biggest lie we have told? . . What does authenticity mean to us? . . and Who are we really?

How do we navigate our lives as genuinely as possible through the stories we are told from our families and society as a whole, even the stories we tell ourselves… so we looked at who we were in terms of what we attract, and what makes us attractive, and to going underneath and looking at our flaws and owning our shit.

After a 15 mins eye-gaze exercise with breathwork in partners, we looked at ways in which ‘we suffer for love’ to get what we want. How do we do this in our relationships and even in our public lives?

In small groups of fours we discussed various ways we ‘suffer for love’. Each group then fed back five examples each to the larger group and I made a list of them all: Do you identify with any?

They echo aspects of CODEPENDENCY.

1. People pleasing/not causing a fuss.
2. I am here 24/7 for you, I will do anything to keep you happy…
3. Manipulating emotions to get acceptance – saying something to gain the acquired response.
4. Guilting someone to get something.
5. Bullying.
6. Pity – seeking or giving.
7. Buying love.
8. Not asserting your own needs – playing the victim.
9. Passive/aggressive modes such as sarcasm.
10. Misinterpreting what has been said to you, knowing that is wrong. but not bothering to really understand the truth as it is easier to misread something.
11. Sabotage.
12. Creating a problem to achieve sympathy – a negative spin.
13. A competition of stress.
14. Faking illness for attention.
15. Refusing love/pulling back/keeping a distance to test love.
16. Being ‘good’ for praise or approval.
17. Flattering and flirting – complimenting for manipulation.
18. Refusing help, putting yourself out there as distressed but rebuffing.
19. Emotional shutdown rather than telling.
20. Humour – using it to deflect and withdrawing it to play the miserable/serious one.

Everyone then went through the list individually, wrote down concrete examples of when they use these techniques and who with – like a confession of what we can do to other people and damage ourselves.

We then went through the list and chose two that resonated strongly and in the next week to observe when we do those things and see if we can change those habits. A hard thing to do but being honest with ourselves about our actions and agendas is a step in the right direction to freeing ourselves from DECEPTION, DENIAL and DOUBLE-SPEAK, in a world where we are surrounded by half truths, shadowy words, twists and turns – we only have to look at the election campaigns at the moment!

. . . and when I got home, my notes were there on the table.

and David was right, it WAS in my head, the notes tallied exactly with what I wrote down in panic! It just goes to show. NO LIE.

Catherine Hoffmann

https://urbanlifeclass.me/the-creative-collective/catherine-hoffman/

urbanLIFECLASS

Bespoke Recovery Coaching from Codependency, Addictions, Relationships or Procrastination. ONLINE or F2F for Post-Pandemic Rebuild.

Category Archives: Codependency Release